Friday, February 19, 2010

The Customer Is Always Right... Unless She's A Moron Like me

I like to think that I'm a pretty bright chick.  I'm somewhat technical.  I've been noted for my ability to turn a phrase.  I can usually figure stuff out and think on my feet.

I work in a technical and creative field.  Typically, I'm assisting those less capable and swallowing my frustration at their inability to understand what is seemingly simple, at least from my perspective.  Hell, I'm paid to write guides to help people understand things!!!

Well, reality check time, self!  It's a good thing I'm cute because I'm not that bright, after all.

My parents gave my son a Guidecraft easel for Christmas.  The little wooden stand up kind with the primary colors that you can use a chalk on one side and wipe off board on the other.  Very cute and just what he wanted.   Of course it didn't come with markers so I let them use some crayons and some old dry erase ones we had lying around.  Only, I couldn't get them to erase.  I scrubbed the crap out of it and only got a little to come off.  I used Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.  I used soap and water.  My husband even got into the act and tried rubbing alcohol.

I figured I'd better get some good dry erase markers.  Figured "Expo" is the go-to brand.  I bought them and had the same issue, throwing every thing but the kitchen sink at this thing to clean it.

I asked around and got a lot of home-remedies and tried them all.  The latest was Lysol Wipes.  Not Clorox Wipes or Pledge Wipes.  LYSOL-BRAND wipes.  Tonight I bought them and began the scrubbing game again.   Elbow grease does not begin to describe.

I was ANGRY.  I got my camera and took a picture, gearing up to write a scathing letter to the company in response to their shoddy craftsmanship.  I scrubbed a little more and notice some curling in the corner.  I couldn't believe it!  Is this piece of garbage DE-LAMINATING TOO!??!

I scraped at the corner some more until it began to peel... and peel some more...  and that was the moment that I began to laugh heartily at what I'd almost done!  I'd almost wrote a blistering complaint to a toy company about their sorry excuse for a wipe-off board and I could just imagine their reply:

"Dear Valued Customer:
Thank you for your letter.  We are sorry you are experiencing difficulty with our product.  We've looked at the picture you enclosed and we believe we have a solution to the problem you are having.  

If you'd simply remove the protective covering from the easel, we believe you will no longer experience any issue wiping away the marker.  To accomplish this, simply start and any corner and, using your fingers (the fingers are the things at the ends of your hands) peel the plastic up and away from the surface of the board.

This should right the situation.   If you have any other issues, please DO hesitate to contact us until you've thoroughly examined the situation.  We're busy people and, frankly, don't have time for your stupidity.

The Smart and Competent People at Guidecraft"

Yes.  I'm that dumb.

But in my defense, that plastic covering was REALLY ON THERE!!!!

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