Friday, November 7, 2014

Who is Dave Jeffords?

One of the weirdest things ever just happened to me.
I was sitting at work and got the following text....

Dave Jeffords: Do you have any poster paper?
Totally normal text, right?
Sure, except that I DO NOT KNOW ANYONE NAMED DAVE JEFFORDS? 

No biggie, right? Just a wrong number.
Sure, except that OBVIOUSLY HE'S IN MY CONTACTS!

WTF?!

Was this like one of those movies where I have to unravel the clues and it turns out I'm missing a year of my life or I'm not who I think I am?

First thing I did was click details...


Yup. There he was, right in my contacts and, wait... is that a f*cking goat?!?!

Dave Jeffords? Is that you?

Yup. Not only is it a goat. It's a goat wearing a hat.

The next thing I did was see where the message ended up. It was connected to a thread from someone I actually know. It's a woman and her name isn't Dave Jeffords. I began to wonder if there was more to her than meets the eye.

So, I texted back "Who is this?"

She responded. It was, in fact, the person I expected to find on the other end of the text. It was not Dave Jeffords, unless, of course, Dave Jeffords had kidnapped her and was using her phone. However, if that were the case, why would he change the contact name to his own and start texting her friends... to see if they had POSTER BOARD no less?!  No, no, no. That couldn't be it.

I sent her a screen capture and typed "I thought it was you but this is who my phone thinks you are."
She could offer no further clues about the identity of Dave Jeffords.

I did what any normal person would do and looked him up on Facebook.
Yup. There he was, goat and all.
Lives clear across the United States from me. 

I searched my email. Had I ever corresponded with Mr. Dave Jeffords? I was just grasping at straw as to how my phone could think this young lady was a dude over 2,000 miles away.

No emails.

Did we have any mutual friends on Facebook?
Nope.

Were we in the same industry? 
Nope.

No connection I could find.

I use a third-party app to sync my Facebook contacts with my phone contacts called Sync.ME and I'm suspicious that is where things went wrong but I can't be sure.
 


I checked all my other contacts and everyone appears as they should be. No gender changes or dashingly accessorized farm animals.

I don't have any answers. I'm going to send this to Dave Jeffords and see if he does but I'm sure he's moving merrily along with his life, not having any idea that he was allegedly texting me for poster board. Maybe I'll get a new friend out of it.

I hope you enjoyed one of the randomest things to ever happen to me as much as I did.





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